Do Not Be Anxious About Tomorrow...

I have had a pain in my side for a week now. I think it is being caused by a new medication I am taking. I have been procrastinating about getting off this medication because it caused my weight to drop by almost fifty lbs. And now my doctor can no longer find evidence that I still have diabetes. So she says it is being controlled by diet.
  The side effects of this medication are awful. I break out all over in itchy red patches. My side has welts all over it. I hurt like the devil. I did this painting a few days ago and I really am pleased with it. It was a sign on my desk that I had made, then I painted and framed it.    Sometimes it is so hard to believe that everything is going to work out okay. I have to be constantly reminded to stay in today, beause today is really all I have.Right now I am in my studio and the temperature is cool and I am listening to music. My little Bible quote is staring back at me: Do not be anxious about tomorrow.  Yet I have to go to the doctor in the morning and I am frightened...  At this moment all my needs are provided for. I am okay. The sun is out. My wife is sleeping peacefully and I am doing one of my favorite things, I am writing. I did a painting today that is one of my favorites. I  also matted and framed  an old work that looks great. Twila Paris said that," gratitude may be a matter of perspective." Sometime I just have to look at all the things I do have. And forget about the troubles tomorrow that may never materialize. Josh Billings said that,  "adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on a fighter: it reduces him to his fighting weight." Even though I am in a lot pain today, I have all the abilities I need to address it. I have the ability to change my perspective....

(If you click on the picture it will appear almost full-size.)
 Have a great day and may God be with you.  Dale

Counting our Blessings.

When you have been a negative spirit all your life it is hard to change. Looking at this little five by seven inch saying on my desk reminds to look for the silver lining. Look for the positive, there must be something that is worth being thankful for. There is always something to be grateful for. It is difficult to change old habits. There is always the tendency to see the worst in every situation. But by looking at this little painting   every day I am reminded  to question the things I am complaining about.  William Saroyan said," be thankful for yourself... be thankful." It is a gift to be here. Sometimes I forget this. Nick Vujicic said that, "I promise you for every disability you have, you are blessed with more than enough "abilities" to overcome your challenges." Nick would know, he was born without arms and legs. He is an inspirational speaker who goes around letting others know that it is important to count your blessings, because you have many... Dale

The Remedy Against Bad Times...

A painting I did a while back to get through some rough times. I keep it on my drafting table where I can see it. My doctor had me on a medication that really made my life miserable. But I was compliant and I figured it was helping. I gained fifty lbs. on it. I acquired diabetes. I painted pictures like this one to inspire me to stick with my doctor's plan. The medication's cost was over a thousand dollars for thirty tablets. I  was relieved when I could no longer afford the pills and I switched to something far cheaper. I lost fifty lbs. My diabetes is now controlled by diet. My physician wonders if I ever had diabetes.   My numbers are in the normal range. Painting has always kept me focused on the goal to improve my situation, no matter how bad it gets. Sometimes I struggle when it seems that nothing is getting better. Yet by painting I take each day and focus on my long term goal of trusting that things will turn out okay... No matter how difficult it is at the moment...

Using the Gift

It was suggested to me that I memorize this passage. So I decided to create a piece of art that would help me. The idea that we are being asked to improve our minds as part of loving God was a novel idea. We are to love God with all our heart, all soul and all our mind. We are to love the idea that He created us and to express it.   Being human is a gift. Yet personally I never give it a thought. . Having belief in God is a unique ability that not everyone has access to. Yet how often do I think about this gift and thank Him for it? To love God is to accept His gifts and talents to us and to utilize them. To thank Him for our good fortune and to accept them with gratitude.  If I love God and cherish the mind that He gave me am I willing to improve it and to think about some of the dumb things I say and do without questioning myself? To love Him with all my heart and soul and to always be grateful for this wonderful gift of a life and a spirit and a mind... Awesome.
     All of us have talents. Yet how often do we take them for granted? I seem to have a talent for numbers, yet my faith in myself never allowed me to utilize this gift. I thought I was too dumb to get things like algebra, calculus, and other elements of higher mathematics. Is it possible to push myself to excel and to use the talents God bestowed upon me?

My Stuff/ A Psalm

I finished a piece of art a day or so ago but I am not happy with it so I decided to take a photograph of colored pencils instead. . One of my favorite things are photos of  art materials. I think it is the color. And I think that it is the idea that all my life I wanted to have the materials necessary to create a work of art and I just like looking at the potential for art....A thunderstorm just blew in so I want to get off of the computer. My dog is beside me and he likes thunderstorms as much as I do.
      The thunderstorm passed. Lightning struck right outside my living room window. My dog and I had a near heart attack at the close proximity of the strike to us. He has become much better at dealing with these storms, while I seem to have grown more anxious as time has gone by.
    Here's an old painting of mine. A Psalm. It is one of my favorite works. This painting has  really made me happy, it just seems to express my feelings about the idea of faith.  I am  always hoping that everything is going to turn out okay, and it does work out, but I worry just the same. Sometimes it seems that we have made decisions in the past that have the potential to be disastrous, yet everything turns out okay in spite of our actions.. . Sometimes I think that I have a guardian angel that I drive crazy with my constant railing at God...  Doesn't it make you wonder how God could love us so much?  We have made so many dumb mistakes and He just forgives us. In spite of our stupidity and arrogance. In spite of the fact that we sometimes seem to just ask for disaster to strike.

Relieving Tension.

I found this little character at a thrift shop today and he found his way onto my drafting table. He is great. I found a piece of pottery as well, I love pottery. The pot is on the far left and it is a good place to throw my tiniest colored pencils. There is something very pleasurable about taking photos of my "stuff." Someone had suggested that I make a sand tray, a technique used to relieve anxiety. The figurine was purchased to use as part of the sand tray experiment. Ever since I ended up on disability anxiety has been a big problem. It creates a lot of tension and my art is one way of combatting it. My partner got very ill in April and it triggered my PTSD. Suddenly I found myself reliving trauma associated with old injuries and I found myself trying to keep my head above water.The sand tray was one technique that was suggested.  Basically, it consists of a rectangular tray filled with white sand. I am going to use a 9x13 inch baking tray. Figurines and other objects are used to work out various conflicts by acting them out in the tray  as I understand it.   I am very fortunate to have a good imagination. But it hasn't always been that way. My head injury right after it happened kept me from doing a lot of things. I read a lot of books on combatting head trauma but I could remember very little of what I read. I tried a support group of head trauma survivors but could not make the adjustment to the group setting. Art was the one thing I could do. I was fortunate in that when I experienced trauma as a child I had an aunt who used art as a way to get me to relax. Her help made art a fixture in my life when I was stressed. I was hit by a car when I was twelve. I stayed with her while I recuperated and her influence  helped me to deal with my injuries. She died of cancer when I was around fourteen and it wasn't until I was eighteen that I started using my art skills as a way to deal with the loss... If anyone knows where one finds white sand I'd appreciate a comment. My partner says that it can be found in nurseries. Any other comments or suggestions are welcome... Thanks. Dale

Art & Expression

A very old picture of mine that still moves me. It was done in the early stages of a relationship that is now fairly solid. This painting was taken  from the chapter on love from the book of Corinthians. Having spent a few years alone because of immaturity, when I found myself in this new relationship I wanted to express my deepest feelings. When I was a kid I would fall in love and use other's art as a way to express myself. I had no original ideas.  For a long time I painted no original art because I had nothing to say. Georgia O' Keefe said that," I can't live where I want to. I cant even say what I want to! I decided I was a very stupid fool not to at least to paint as I wanted to." It took me a very long time to paint as I wanted to. I had to live alone for five years without a relationship to realize that I had something to say. Perhaps I couldn't say what I wanted to, because there was no one to say it to, and at the time I could not live where I wanted to for various reasons, but I could at least paint as I wanted to.   Perhaps falling back on the Bible is not an original idea, but I was in good company. William Blake used the Bible for inspiration, Rembrandt used it, as did Raphael. Each said something unique using words and images that had stirred people's hearts for thousands of years....