Gratitude

I have been reading a book on gratitude and the author suggests some steps to take to improve an individual's thankfulness. One suggestion is to be specific as possible. Rather than say my father did a great job of  raising me, try saying he  offered me advice only when I asked, he worked at giving me praise, and for making sure that I knew that he was proud of the ways I took care of responsibilities promptly. Another suggestion, offer a number of sentences of detail. Rather than say, I am grateful for God. Say that I woke up this morning and the sun was shining and the air was mild and I had a phenomenol night's sleep and I had the sense that God had created this  wonderful day just for me. The more concrete and detailed we make our praise the more likely we are to remember it. One individual had offered his testimony in the book and he admitted he had made some terrible mistakes and that he had no idea what the future held for him. Neverthless, he said that he had a motto in life, expect nothing, appreciate everything.
     I went through a period of my life that was filled with deep depression and a perpetual sense of darkness. As a result, I would often do long gratitude lists.  I had heard that certain Jewish groups have to do a list of 100 things they are grateful for. The first time I attempted this I struggled over the list a long time. Later attempts were much easier. Gratitude lists become easier with practice. One thing I noticed was how little relief they offered me. The idea of being specific and in depth offers me a bit of hope that my exercises in gratitude can improve. When I discussed my Dad's parenting style, this made me smile. My Dad passed some years ago and it is good to think about his efforts to be a good father. When I was sixteen he attempted to build my siblings and I a go-kart. He had problems with the clutch and the attempt showed how much he cared for his children. When the go-kart experiment did not work out he went out and bought my brother's and I a small motorcycle. Although he struggled with a large family he often paid attention to improving our lives whenever he could.
     Gratitude journals have always been hard for me. It was only on the worst days that I could bring myself to do one. As someone who was often the recipient of advice on how to improve my attitude while dealing with illness, gratitude was not easy. I felt singled out for harsh treatment by my creator. I thought it was unfair that I struggled with illness and injury all my life. I needed to be reminded that my siblings were not as fortunate as I . My illnesses carried the mixed blessings of being offered more than my fair share of attention. I became an artist, as many do, because of my many significant periods alone. Robert Louis Stevenson was often sickly and it was his  long periods of convalescence that gave him the opportunity to write his stories and poetry. So it has become clear to me as Twila Paris the Christian singer once said, "gratitude can be as simple as perspective." I became an artist because of illness. Robert Louis Stevenson wrote "Treasure Island" because he fought a long term illness as well.
      I have finally  made it through my long period of depression. Looking back, many gratitude lists certainly helped.  Socializing helped. Religion helped. Art helped. I am much more grateful today. I wake up in the morning without any dread of facing a new day.Previously, there were days when I saw no hope. I posted a sign where I could see it that read, you shall be secure, because there is hope. (Job 11:18). I constantly relied on the fact that the only thing I had was hope. There is an old saying that says we are to not give up five seconds before the miracle happens. Gratitude is a definite bonus in times of uncertainty. The lesson seems to have been for me to use every trick that you can manage to stay positive. Even  when it seems that positives are hard to come by. And to remember something that one of Abraham Lincoln's advisors told him during one of his darkest hours: " This too shall pass." Stay positive. Dale

The Spiritual Gift of the Steps. .

Spriritual gift-Art. Some years ago I got involved in a twelve-step program. I stayed with it 'til I felt that the issue had resolved. About five years. I learned the techniques and moved on. Julia Cameron was a twelve-stepper. She wrote "The Artist's Way." She said that if you followed the artist's way of working, you could get a handle on issues that were bothering you. One was was a technique called the "Morning Pages." I found that the pages worked and that I eventually found myself painting, drawing and doing small inspirational quotations with pen and ink and watercolor.. Anne Lamott is another twelve-stepper.  She discovered that her spirituality was found partially in the church. She discovered that her ability to write gave her the ability to pass along the message of recovery.
     The steps were discovered by Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob Smith. They work, and  the idea is simple, find a power that you can call God. Bill Wilson was able to stay sober because he found that if he helped someone else he could stay sober. He discovered God and that His power in the form of helping others could be the source of his sobriety. He helped Dr Bob Smith and launched AA. Spirituality comes in many forms. Some find it in church, some find it in nature. I found it in art. I create art and pass it on to others to show that if you can improve that  person's situation you can motivate them to make the changes necessary to find a power greater than their problems-God. Julia Cameron, when she wrote "The Artist's Way, " discovered that the spiritual power of art was a wonderful source of self-esteem. A source of power to change one's perception of his or herself . Art is a way of healing wounded emotions.
     For centuries men were able to use the healing power of art to say things about the nature of God. The beauty of His strength and power. People discovered that this power was not only available to artists, anyone could utilize it. And that they could use it to get in touch with a power that would heal them of their problems-whatever they were. The reason I bring up the steps is that it is a source of finding many forms of spirituality. For me, it was creativity. I discovered prayer and meditation and self-appraisal were also  part of the package.  Anyone can give up the negative power that is killing them and get better. All that is required is honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness. I guess the reason that I am plugging AA and the steps is that they returned me to sanity. And as someone who has recovered it is important I pass on what I learned. I found that with pen, paper, ink, and watercolor that I had a gift.    Anne Lamott has became a wonderful writer who passes on the joy of recovery. Julia Cameron teaches that if we follow some simple guidelines we are capable of developing wonderful abilities. And becoming genuine artists. And finding that we have something to offer the world-if we only choose to try. 

Is art a commodity or spiritual gift?

Over the last few weeks I was creating almost every day. I was at my friend's Mark's house helping him to build a backyard pond. I noticed something familiar: I said to Mark, "you're having fun aren't you." The way he was lifting and carrying rocks looked somehow familiar. It reminded me what I do when I am creating a large painting and I am examining it from different angles and moving my head to side to side. It's fun. Mark wasn't moving large, heavy rocks, he was playing. When I was a little kid I did the same thing. I'd build kingdoms and fight battles with just toy soldiers and cardboard boxes.
     I have been going to church for the last six weeks. I have been to two churches and the pastor of another church came to our home to offer my wife communion. Each of these three churches had less than sixty members in the pews. It was startling.
     Painting the last few days has been on hold. From staying home every day I now find myself out and about every day. This blog had no hits the last time I posted. I have had no time to post. Someone once wrote that if you want to be an artist you have to spend lots of time alone. I just don't do that anymore. Artists spend time with other artists, but mostly it is a lonely pursuit. It is a very solitary experience. My friend Mark is another artist. He creates furniture. He used to make driftwood worlds for little figurines. When I watched Mark today creating, I realized art for me is fun. One day I took my work into the local shop where I sell it and one of the other employees said of my work: " That is the happiest piece of art in the shop." Art is a spiritual gift. The sermon I heard today was about artists and their unique perspective on the world. At the risk of sounding conceited it is like being tied into the creativity of God. This pastor said that artist's have a unique spiritual gift. Julia Cameron wrote a book about it called, "The Artist's Way." For me, this book did something to me that I had been able to do, but Julia Cameron showed me how to do it everyday. Not just haphazardly, but consistently. Julia Cameron had somehow found out how artist's create. And she wrote an entire book about it. It is old news now. The Artist's Way has sold millions of copies. Go to a site like Pinterest and you can see how many millions of artists are in this country.
     I haven't been posting my pictures anymore, I have been selling them. Not much Sometimes it seems art is not about money at all. You don't sell your favorite cake recipe, you share it with  friends. I give almost all my work away. I don't even want to sell it. It is just good to share an inspirational painting with a friend who is struggling with depression. But the tendency is to see art as a commodity. A way to gain fame and fortune. So often I say to myself now, I can't post this, someone will steal my idea. I gave my wife's pastor a work and she cried. There is a verse in the Bible that is Ephesians 6:8. It says that whatever good a man does for someone, the Lord will repay him in kind. I gave the pastor a painting and the next day I created the best work I have ever done. Now it is up to me to share this work with others, so that I can create more works. But it is scary. What about the money? What about the success that I have always craved? I don't know how to find out if others feel this way as well. I guess it is just a question that will have to go unanswered.

God bless. Dale